Things I wish I had known about having a newborn
There are loads of things you won’t know about dealing with a newborn baby until you actually have one, but here are the things that I really wish I had known beforehand.
1. Bottles, bottles, bottles…
You can never have too many bottles if you are formula feeding. When babies are newborn 
A tip to consider – if you are formula feeding don’t waste your money buying too many of the small newborn bottle sizes as your baby will most likely be drinking about 5-6oz after a few months, which renders the small bottles obsolete.
Also, some babies don’t take to bottles well so you may want to try different brands. My baby took to the MAM anti-colic bottles quickly but some prefer the Dr Brown’s or other types. You could try one brand first and if your baby seems fine then go ahead and buy the rest of your bottles.
Remember you will need to change teat size as your baby grows. The recommended size is dependant on the type of bottle you use so always refer to the manufacturer’s recommendations. Most brands have an easy to follow size guide.
2. Hot and cold babies!
This may be brushed off or denied by midwives and Health Visitors alike, but I guarantee you that such a thing is possible. My little boy was always a very hot baby and I knew the risk of SIDS was higher in babies who got too hot, so this was something that really worried me as a first time parent. He overheated so easily that we mainly dressed him in vests for those first few weeks and used cellular blankets or anything that allowed plenty of airflow. In contrast, my sister’s baby who was only a few weeks older was always wrapped up to the neck in layers of clothes and loved her warm fleecy blankets, just proving how different each baby is.
Keep in mind that babies need dressing and wrapping according to the temperature around them. Having a room thermometer is really ideal and will help you know how warm or cool to dress your baby. You are looking for anything between 16-20oC with 18oC being the recommended temperature.
We used an Gro Egg room thermometer, but there are many on the market to pick from. Remember that most baby monitors have an in-built temperature gauge which could save a few pennies.
It is also recommended that babies sleep in the same room as their parents at least for the first six months. We used a snuzpod which was ideal and I would highly recommend one, even if you do not attach it to the bed it is still much more sturdy than a moses basket and can last twice as long.
3. Newborn gagging
In all my research prior to becoming a parent I had never (that I remember, 
considering my baby brain) come across any information on newborn gagging. Unfortunately my initial discovery of this was my first night at home from the hospital with my baby.
My husband had been cooking dinner and spending some quality time with our baby while I had my first uninterrupted nap in two days, since going into labour. When he bought my baby up to me, after an hour or so, I was happy to have a cuddle.
The first thing I noticed was that my baby was very hot, more than he needed to be (which could have been due to the heat from our oven). I immediately took his clothes off to cool him down. First panic over, I decided to lay him down in his cot to sleep, but I suddenly heard a gagging sound coming from him. I sat him up quickly to help him clear the fluid and the few seconds it took him to do so felt like a torturous eternity.
It was a very stressful moment and I will never forget the feeling of helplessness that came with being a first time parent and having no clue what was normal for a baby or what to expect.
Thankfully my baby’s gagging cleared up after a few days, but we kept a very watchful eye on him for those first few months, just to be safe.
What my baby had experienced is actually very normal and more common than I knew at the time. Baby gagging is when there is fluid that builds up in the lungs and your baby makes a gurgling type of noise to try and clear it. The midwife told me that when a baby is pushed out your contractions also work to squeeze this excess fluid out of his lungs. As I had had an assisted delivery with forceps, it was likely that my baby had this fluid because of a little excess build up.
The main thing to know is that it is normal and your baby will be completely fine.
For further information, you could check out this newborn choking post from Verywell.com
4. First Hospital Night & Baby Shakes
I don’t think I will ever forget that first night I spent in the hospital maternity ward with my newborn baby. He had been born in the morning and so I had spent the day with him learning how to feed and swaddle and even how to simply hold him. The day had flown by so quickly, with visits from family and regular checks from midwives. But when night fell and I was on my own the magnitude of the situation started to sink in.
Here I was laying in hospital with severe bleeding and blood loss. I had been through a long tiring labour which left me exhausted and not even in control of my basic bodily functions. Yet in my arms was this tiny baby who needed all of my energy and focus.
I had harvested my colostrum due to Gestational Diabetes, as this is recommended so that if your baby’s sugar levels are low you can give them the additional feed to balance things out. The hospital had my syringes and I was very happy giving my baby all the extra nutritional goodness I had taken months to collect and freeze.
Now, babies sleep a lot when they are first born and your newborn will usually have his/her first poop (meconium) a day or two after their birth. But honestly, I think I was the only parent on the whole ward who had to change their baby at least twice during that first night. He was always and still is very regular with his bowel movements.
Needless to say I did not get very much sleep that first night at the hospital. But I was managing fine… until I noticed how often my baby would jump, sort of like he had been scared. He would suddenly throw his little arms out with his hands open wide and shake before bringing his arms back in.
My local hospital is great, the maternity staff were so helpful, but one thing that really bothered me was how none of them were able to figure out what was wrong with him or give me a clear answer. I asked every midwife I could find and it wasn’t until the next morning when the Head Midwife was on shift that I finally got the reassurance I needed.
The midwife knew exactly what he had been doing before I even tried to explain and she put my mind at ease straight away. She explained that it was totally normal for newborn babies to have these little tremors or starts. They are used to being in a small confined space in your womb and suddenly they have more space than they have ever known. The midwife pointed out that he probably did this less when I held him and that was because he was all wrapped up in my arms snugly. Babies are also born with a startle reflex which usually disappears by 3 months.
If any mother ever experiences this please do rest assured that your baby is completely fine and there is absolutely no need to worry. Just give them a nice cuddle and it will eventually pass.
5. Breastfeeding can be HARD
The benefits to breastfeeding are endless, but first and foremost it’s the most nutritious way to feed your baby. Even if you only feed your baby for a few days the colostrum your baby receives is packed full of antibodies and really kick starts your baby’s in immune system.
Another benefit is weight loss (can’t really go wrong there!). Breastfeeding is cost effective, it’s better for healing post delivery, and it’s convenient – no making formula up or bottle washing!
However, despite its many benefits some women struggle with breastfeeding for various reasons. Inverted nipples, trouble with the baby latching on, not producing enough milk – just to name a few. And while some mum’s choose to formula feed their babies, I had chosen to give breastfeeding a try before going straight to formula.
My personal experience of with this was also a challenge. Having never breastfed before it’s not always easy to know if you’re doing it right. No matter how many books you read nothing can prepare you for that first latch.This is usually attempted straight after a very long and tiring labour, yet it seems the most natural thing to do and I didn’t hesitate when my baby first sought me for comfort and sustenance.
The midwife very helpfully reminded me what to do, but holding my baby correctly and making sure he latched correctly whilst supporting him was confusing. How could I tell if he was feeding? Why did he fall asleep after what seemed only minutes of feeding? Why did I keep forgetting to use my pinky to detach him and ending up with sore and scabbed nipples as a result? Also did I need to wash or sterilize my nipples somehow before each feed? Why did it hurt so much when he latched on? These were only some of the questions I had.
But all of my questions did have an answer, I know this now… however at the time it was very overwhelming.
Oh and by the way your boobs will leak – a lot, like constantly dripping taps… so do stock up on plenty of beast pads as you’ll be changing them regularly. And if you have a bath be ready with two empty bottles as the hot water is like turning the leaking taps onto full flow.
On the plus side one thing that I found – the more you practise breast feeding the better you will get. It took me the whole evening and whole day thereafter with many different midwives trying to help me before I finally felt comfortable doing it. This was a shock because even having known beforehand that women struggled I guess I had assumed that breastfeeding was as natural, instinctive, and as easy as breathing! But it isn’t. For some women, such as myself, it was a struggle. But it was definitely worth it. And as a reminder, babies are born with stomachs the size of a 5 pence piece and so don’t need a lot of colostrum to feel full. By day 3 when your milk comes in their tummies will have grown to the size of a walnut. Babies are also born with reserves so never panic that they aren’t getting enough food initially.
Breastfeeding is well worth it for so many different reasons and even if you can only do it for a week or month or if you try but it doesn’t work out then give yourself a massive pat on the back because it’s painfully difficult both physically and emotionally – but the main thing is you tried.
I’ll never forget the first time my baby had his immunisations and after ten minutes of getting home and having his milk he vomited all over my husband and went a very scary pale colour. I instantly breastfed him more for comfort than for food and my heart almost burst with fierce pride as his screaming wails instantly hushed and his pale cheeks grew rosy with colour again as he drifted off peacefully to sleep. Its unlike any accomplishment I’ve ever felt, and that memory will be etched in my heart forever knowing that I was there for my baby when he needed me the most. So even though it was difficult for me to breastfeed and I could only keep it up for about 3.5 months I’ll always be happy that I tried and gave it my all.
Here are one of the many websites which discuss some questions about breastfeeding.
http://www.babygaga.com/15-things-new-moms-dont-know-about-breastfeeding/
Remember to drink PLENTY of water when breast feeding as this will help with milk supply and you’ll probably find yourself gasping for a drink when your baby feeds.
